In 1980, Denny Watts had to drive down from Seattle to Portland for a meeting at his head office.
“One of my co-workers in Portland said there was a new beautiful executive secretary,” recollects Denny, now the “semi-retired” president of Vet Construction & Engineering LLC. “I met the woman that knocked my socks off. I was totally smitten and knew this was the woman who had to be part of my life. The greatest part of it all? She felt the same way.”
Like many couples, the Watts learned that falling in love is just the beginning. It’s how you move forward together in life that counts. That decision doesn’t always begin with sparks and heart-eyes, though. Sometimes it takes soul-searching, healing from past hurts, and a resolute determination to trust not only your own heart, but someone else’s.
“We were like magnets to iron, constantly pulled toward each other, but we both had come from hard and difficult relationships,” says Denny. After two years, the couple took a break. “Both of us had said we really never wanted to be married again.”
A couple of months later, Janet went to her office. Waiting on her desk were two dozen roses and a card that said, “Will you marry me?”
Janet and Denny Watts married in 1982, and have shared life’s joys and challenges ever since.
Enduring love has a way of pushing through not only the roadblocks and barriers that life puts up, but the ones that we put in our own way.
For Eugene Chief of Police Chris Skinner and Beaverton School District Public Safety Administrator Kari Skinner, the key was seeing, and trusting, a shared future of connection, happiness—and family.
In 2001, Chris and Kari met while working at the Hillsboro Police Department outside of Portland. Chris was ten years older, and Kari had her own share of wariness from relationships gone awry.
“I kissed a lot of frogs before I found my prince.”
Chris felt wary of company romances, but “at some point, the heart wants what the heart wants.” Along with a desire to be a dad, “I could see myself as a better person and a happier person with her.”
Drawn to one another, the two began dating in 2005, tentatively, but with growing hope. One day while at her house in Hillsboro, Kari had gone outside while Chris was upstairs. Movement down below caught his attention.
“Kari’s neighbor across the street had two small children, and they had just arrived home from where they’d been,” he recalls. “The kids immediately ran across the street, where Kari scooped them up into her arms. These two kids just loved being around Kari. I saw how she embraced those kids, and at that moment I knew I was looking at the mother of my children.”
They got engaged in 2006, married in 2007, and are the parents of two children who love sports and service—not to mention, as they joke, having so much in town named after them.
As far as they know, their lineage doesn’t connect with pioneer settlers Eugene and Mary Skinner. But when Kari and Chris moved their family to Eugene in 2018, “the kids thought it was cool to have a park and a butte named after us.”
Kari also credits their professional connection with building their romantic foundation.
“I knew well before he knew. I loved his servant heart and the way he cared for his officers, for the community,” she explains. “When I would hear him speak publicly, I fell in love with him. He was speaking from the heart every time. That was very attractive.”
Shared activities and a sense of community have been definitive too.
“We have an amazing support system in Eugene,” says Kari. “Some legacy Eugene families have really taken us in.”
Around town, the Skinners enjoy UO athletics and Thai food, especially Sabai and Chao Pra Ya. Whether Shop With A Cop holiday events, Boys and Girls Club, Kids FIRST Children’s Advocacy Center, or the Angel Hair Foundation, Chris and Kari maintain extensive involvement in the community, along with their kids. Just as they work hard though, they play hard too, together as a family.
“We frequently go to Central Oregon, skiing in mountain snow, summers in the river,” says Kari. “It’s an easy weekend trip.”
Common interests can also bond a couple and lead to new adventures.
Since getting married in 2017, KEZI anchor Chelsea Deffenbacher and Tavern on Main owner Andrew Deffenbacher also love to take advantage of the area’s nature, whether in Sunriver, Newport, or their home at Fern Ridge Reservoir. Favorite date nights for the Deffenbachers include Cafe Med, Kennedy’s Steakhouse, Gordon Tavern, or Beppe & Gianni’s.
None of that might have happened, though, if Chelsea hadn’t rented an apartment above Andrew’s b2 wine bar in Crescent Village in 2014. She had recently moved to Eugene, and took a friend from Seattle to b2 one Friday night.
“The only seats available were at the bar,” recalls Chelsea. “Andrew was making drinks and conversation. We went on a date the next week. I knew pretty quickly he was the one!”
Fern Ridge Reservoir was also key to James and Pennie Harding, founders of Harding Electric.
“We both enjoyed sporting activities., played softball on different teams, and played together on a traveling coed team,” says Pennie. “When we started having children, we would coach their sporting events. Now we have the pleasure of watching our grandchildren play.”
You’ll also find the Hardings enjoying snow skiing and water sports—or a meal out at Ye Olde Pancake House.
For Janet and Denny Watts, change has been a constant, including living in twenty homes, residing in six states, and having extended stays in six countries.
“We loved to visit many countries and had the opportunity to see them through the eyes of the locals because of the projects we were building there,” says Denny.
Since moving from Hawaii to Eugene in 2021, they enjoy performances at the Hult Center for the Performing Arts, day trips to the coast and to Portland, dining locally at Café Med or Café Soriah, and watching the game at Side Bar, The Gateway Grill, or Prime Time Sports Bar & Grill.
They also keep a special tradition, begun in their younger years when money was tight.
“Our Christmas tradition is spending only twenty dollars on each other, having thirty minutes to shop, and the gift has to have a reason or story behind it for why it is special for the other person,” explains Denny.
Why $20?
“This is what we had on our first Christmas because we were broke and barely had enough to pay the heating bill. After we became more successful and financially secure, we realized we could buy all the things we wanted, but they didn’t have meaning.”
It’s one of the little things Janet and Denny do to appreciate one another. But there are some big things too.
One day, Janet was on a morning flight leaving Pittsburgh.
The day?
Sept. 11, 2001.
“One of the planes crashed not far from our office outside of Pittsburgh,” recalls Denny. “It took me five long hours to find out she was safe. From that time on, we celebrate being together, how lucky we are, and being alive. We also felt the reality of how devastating it would be to lose one or the other. We never leave the house without saying ‘I love you,’ because it could have been our last chance to have done so.”
Appreciation, respect, forgiveness, and enjoying one another’s company: all these and more go into building a long-lasting marriage that not only endures, but brings joy. And it can start at the wedding.
“The two people who are going to remember your wedding the most are just you two,” explains Chris. “Make sure you’re true to yourself, build the memories you’re going to enjoy, and have good boundaries about the outside noise, from family and friends. The only ones who remember the details are Kari and me, and that’s all that matters.”
Talking about everything, leaving nothing unsaid, has been essential to Chelsea and Andrew.
“Talk about everything and never leave anything unsaid,” says Chelsea. “Share an interest in each other’s day, be intentional with your words and time, and have the hard conversations, too, because you never know how anyone else is feeling, the good or the bad, unless you talk about it.”
The pair call themselves a “true team,” and Chelsea considers her husband her best friend.
“I tell him everything. He’s made all of my dreams come true and I am so lucky to have a man by my side that always makes me feel like he’s my number-one fan. And vice versa! I’m his biggest cheerleader in all that he does.”
Navigating day-to-day tasks and bigger challenges comes with any life, marriage, or other endeavor. But for Janet and Denny Watts, maintaining a deep joy for one another has been key.
“We both lived what didn’t work and the pain that came with it. All the love and romance in the world could not offset incompatibility, and we understood that,” explains Denny. “We have joy. We still get excited to see each other, even if it’s only after a few hours apart.”
And above all, says Denny, “There is never a day I don’t tell her how much I love her, and vice versa.”
